Said Without Batting An Eye

(My boyfriend and I are driving home after going to dinner. It is late and I'm a little loopy/tired.)

Boyfriend: "We can do anything your little heart desires once we get home."

Me: "My heart desires goodnight. Hey, you know what's weird and kind of creepy?"

Boyfriend: "…what?"

Me: "If an animal got hit by a car and its eyeball popped out, the eyeball would still glow in the dark."

Boyfriend: "What?! Can we not? That is so creepy!"

Me: "Well, I mean, it wouldn't glow in the dark, but it would still reflect light."

Boyfriend: "CAN WE NOT?! Stop talking about it! That's super weird and creepy!"

Showered With Love

(My boyfriend, with whom I live, works in a hospital. He has just come home from work and is about to take a shower.)

Me: "Didn't you take a shower this morning?"

Boyfriend: "Yes, I think so."

Me: "So why do you need a shower again so soon?"

Boyfriend: "Well, I always feel germy after work."

Me: "I guess that makes sense, but why did you take a shower this morning? Wouldn't it make more sense to skip it and just take afternoon showers?"

Boyfriend: "That's what I used to do."

Me: "What changed?"

Boyfriend: "Having sex the night before work?"

Me: "Touché."

Could Swear She's From Boston

(I am English, and my girlfriend is a (New York) American At this point we are talking over Skype about arguments, as I am very patient and don't get angry.)

Girlfriend: "How will I know if I piss you off?"

Me: "Well, we're really open with each other, so I'm sure I'd talk it through with you."

Girlfriend: "You'll know when you piss me off."

Me: "I'm aware. You let me know." *laughs*

Girlfriend: "Yeah, one day you'll walk into the bathroom and find the tub and sink full of water, and all of your dumb tea bags in them and the toilet."

Me: *laughing* "Really?"

Girlfriend: "Yep. Tea Party time, b****!"

Admin @ 05:28
Tagged @ Best Love Quotes

Love | Romantic Quotes